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Netflix and Not Chill

Netflix and Not Chill

Dear Good Somm Bad Somm,

I date a girl who only likes to smoke marijuana and drink craft beer.  I opened a bottle of Barolo the other night and she vaped a hit Banana Smoothie flavored cannabis oil and fell asleep with a growler of IPA.  I had to drink the Barolo alone, what should I do? 

Yours,

Netflix and Not Chill

Good Somm

Dear Netflix and Not Chill,

Your question feels a bit like the older pot calling the kettle black.  These days, especially now that cannabis is legal either medically or recreationally in 29 states, both cannabis and beer are taken quite seriously.  Isn’t it your job as a sommelier to know the basics of beer?  I wouldn’t be surprised if the Court of Master Sommeliers one day requires a general knowledge of cannabis too.  So rather than judging your lady friend, perhaps you can use this as an opportunity to get to know the various styles the incredibly complex world of beer has to offer.  Maybe find out if that banana cannabis smoothie strain pairs well with Barolo.  I bet it won’t – a bubble-gummy Beaujolais might – but you tried, and trust me the ladies appreciate when men at least try. 

Best,

Good Somm

Bad Somm

Dear Netflix and Not Chill,

Dump the beer loving Neanderthal woman and only date somms as rule.  I myself date advanced level blondes exclusively.  Regardless of your standards within the confines of wine expertise, just imagine the possibilities!  You can conduct blind tastings in the dark while simultaneously making out!  You can listen to wine podcasts on road trips and guffaw at all the jokes only a knowledgeable somm would understand!  You’ll name your children Comte Liger-Belair and Egon Müller-Scharzhoff because you love Burgundy and she covets aged Riesling.  Just don’t disagree when she thinks a wine is corked. . .I’ve gone through several breakups over this.

Sincerely,

Bad Somm

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